Wednesday 10 April 2013

Descriptive essay- New Year's Eve

Energy in the air was inviting, however the temperature was repelling us. Sharp diffidence stiffened our hands and brought rosy blush to our cheeks provided the irresistible antepast kept us planted where we stood. Before a permeate of violet or a pigment of green could be seen, a crowd gathered, shivering and excited. There was bustle and crack around us. Everyone was getting settled close together to uphold their heat and to begin to agitate excitement. I took a deep, frozen breath as my lungs swelled with air. Overhead, the sparse clouds cleared interchangeable opening curtains to reveal the young night. I leaned over towards the untoughened fragrance and clenched his arm. The air was a stingray nipping at my heels and pinching my nose. Above the vague horizon of pines, the thrash about suddenly detonate into a splash of colours and patterns.

10...

Fiery red and golden lily-livered dispersed into freckles of azure and then blended into the tone of the universe. Ruby-peach bows streak across the panorama and then disappeared. For a second, my heart dropped, but then suddenly picked up to twice its tempo when the saucy clashing colours scattered across the blue. With each sequential burst, the colour was a chameleon, constantly changing its surrounding.

9...

The liveliness was same a steaming kettle ready to blow. My heartbeat accelerated, and all chemical in my body was unstable. The electric pulses in the sky vibrated and pounded into my bones with each successive firework. My blood flow finally caught up to my heartbeat and they continued to quicken in an automatic rifle impulse.

8...

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The explosions multiplied. A loud eruption in a cypher of a second caught us off guard, and we watched in astonishment, as the dangerous show continued. Each war of sound was competing to be the...

Your article written on New Years is greatly detailed and a charm to read to oneself. However, I spotted the need to keep scrolling down the page which was a turnoff. I recommend you blend a couple of your paragraphs together and lay aside a new article with less paragraphs.

Overall, an ok essay.

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